September 17, 2008

EDITORIAL: Leaked (if not forged) 'internal memo' hints at Bugatti Veyron GT

Early this week, a Danish automotive blog published an image of a memo confirming the production of a high performance, end-of-the-line Bugatti Veyron GT.

The memo claims that the GT tuning program would increase output of the Veyron's 8.0 liter quad-turbo V-16 to 1,350 horsepower and 1,018 pound-feet of torque. Additional GT spec upgrades would be applied to the car's carbon-ceramic brakes, electronic stability control program and the car's active aerodynamics.

The increased power would theoretically cut the Veyron's 0-60 mph time by two-tenths of a second to 2.4 and raise the Veyron's top speed from 252 to 264 mph. The tuning program would also be made available for any Veyron currently in production.

But take off the rose-colored glasses, folks.
There are plenty of reasons why this "memo" isn't worth the paper it's presumably printed on.

For an internal memo, there's a lot of irrelevant puffery injected into the copy.

The self-congratulatory tripe covers topics such as the GT's "ingenious aerodynamics, which keeps [sic] it on the road even at full speed." God forbid the laws of aerodynamic lift were to suddenly fail at 250 miles per hour. How on earth would an airplane fly in such a case?

On the subject of braking, where one would expect specifics such as rotor dimensions or piston count, the memo nebulously defines the GT upgrades as follows: "Such a super sports car may not seem to be brought to a halt easily, but the Veyron's ceramic special GT brakes slow it down faster than it can accelerate."

All of this is irrelevant to an engineer; reading it would do nothing but waste time. And if the memo was directed toward marketing the tuning program, why the numerous grammar errors and failed logic?

Lastly, considering that Bugatti SAS is a French company wholly owned by the Volkswagen-Audi Group, why was this "memo" written in English?

Suspending a veritable Mount Everest of disbelief, the memo sets March 2009 as the delivery date for the Veyron GT, which would coincide with the Geneva Motor Show.

Daydreamers and Russian oligarchs alike, don't hold your breath.

[Memo source:]
[Image courtesy: Bugatti SAS]

No comments:

Post a Comment

Be the first to share your thoughts on this article!